Orphans of the Storm (1921)

So this is kind of random for horror month. It is still the very end of September and I wanted to dive into something other than horror before October started. A film I found online, so I was able to watch it in quicktime at one and a half speed... something that is a necessity for getting though D.W. Griffith films without several breaks and a nap.

The film stars Lillian Gish, Griffith's muse, an actress that I've seen WAY too much of over the last two years. I just don't find her attractive, so the damsel in distress and pretty star character doesn't fit for me.

Griffith does his best to piss off and make fun of just about everyone, Blacks in Birth of a Nation, and the French here. The film takes place at the start of the French revolution and shows the aristocratic luxurious lifestyle in contrast with the beggers and laborers. Gish winds up with a blind sister through very complicated means, and when taking her to town to try and find a suitor she is kidnapped.

Using the French revolution as a means of her escape and lovers exile, the plot is overly complicated and cheesy, no surprise really. This is a typical Griffith film with a two and a half hour run time. You might just forget you ever heard of it.

Vote: 5/10

IMDB Link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0012532/

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Legion (2010)

Not really a horror movie, but filled with some sort of zombie possessed demons, this was more of a scary action film. There is actually a pretty decent cast with Paul Bettany (The Da Vinci Code, Dogville ,The Young Victoria), Lucas Black (Jarhead, Cold Mountain, Friday Night Lights), and Dennis Quaid (Far from Heaven, The Rookie).

The premise is that God is unhappy with the world so he brings on the Apocalypse. Somehow this group in the diner are the only people that God has no control over and are fighting to save mankind.

From a horror month standpoint the movie was pretty cool. The old lady and kid going nuts and crawling on the ceiling were awesome. The special effects were kind of fun and I liked the first 20-30 minutes. I actually thought this was going to be a "worth watching" film at this point.

Problem is that none of it really makes any sense. It was far fetched at first, but when someone can survive falling off a cliff it is beyond logical. I gave it a Just average because of the cool scenes early on, but this could very easily just be a 3 or 4 if I wasn't in a good mood that day. Probably better to just skip this one.

Vote: 6/10

IMDB Link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1038686/

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Splice (2009)

Adrien Brody and Sarah Polley star in a film that has been mislabeled as a horror film. This is actually a science fiction film about gene splicing.

Brody and Polley work in a lab splicing genes and creating some pretty interesting looking creatures in attempts to create vaccines for humans. When they start talking about using human genes their project gets canned. They start working in the lab basement and at home, probably all incredibly illegal to begin with... when they actually create a creature from human genes things start to get really messy.

I hate to say more than this, because the best part of the film is seeing what happens in their development. Polley does a great job of acting like a crazy mother and the film starts to take some strange turns. Just not one of my favorite sci-fi films. Rated just after The Box, it is hard to explain why I would watch that one again before this one. Maybe because the story was more original. This one just seemed too cookie cutter and the plot was basic and predictable.

Left open for a sequel, which frustrates me even more, because it tells me money was always a goal, not quality.

Vote: 5/10

IMDB Link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1017460/

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The Box (2009)

This years big box office flop starring Cameron Diaz and James Marsden as a couple who receive a box on their door step in the middle of the night. The next day Frank Langella, missing a portion of his face, shows up and explains that if the button is pushed they would receive a million dollars but that someone would die.

Crossing the border into Science Fiction, with Marsden working for NASA we start to see some really strange events take place. Others at NASA are involved, and we discover that Langella's character might be either a government worker or something we can't explain.

The movie really had me drawn in for the first 45 minutes or so. I couldn't understand why this was such a flop. The movie just gets really slow, bizarre, and boring at the end. I was battling falling asleep and completely lost interest at the end. Honestly I'm not sure exactly how it ended, but I was so bored and sleepy I just didn't care. Maybe a 6 is a little generous...

Vote: 6/10

IMDB Link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0362478/

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Man Bites Dog: C'est arrivé près de chez vous (1992)

A very interest mix of genres here. This is a horror comedy documentary. What? Ok, so the film is about a serial killer, who has a camera crew following him around making a documentary. You would really call this a mockumentary, since it is a comedy about making documentaries.

The crew asks few questions of the serial killer, who runs the show. He discusses how he picks his victims, he screws up and yet has little to no trouble fixing them, usually comedic-ally getting the crew involved in the murders.

There are some funny scenes, like discussing how much he needs to weigh different types of bodies when throwing them into a ravine. They encounter another serial killer with his camera crew and fight it out. Crew members get accidentally shot.

It is a very dark comedy, and I'm not sure all jokes translated from French to English well. It was just ok to me, maybe because I've already seen a couple serial killer movies this year. It was a little boring. Not bad overall though, especially for horror month.

Vote: 6/10

IMDB Link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103905/

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Peeping Tom (1960)

Compared on several levels to Psycho, another 1960 release, this creepy film was a breakthrough in the genre. To this point many horror films were shot in black and white to give the illusion that what you are watching is JUST a story, including Psycho.

The movie does two things really well. First, it has a realness to it that make you think this could actually happen in your own town. The main character is almost robotic with no remorse, making his victims look in a mirror as he kills them on camera. Second, it makes you actually show compassion for the bad guy. Showing his awful childhood and almost justifying his actions.

A British movie that didn't do all that well in the US, if you want a good creepy older horror movie this is a good choice.

Vote: 8/10

IMDB Link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0054167/

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Killers (2010)

Killers, not a horror movie, even though I watched it in horror month. I needed a change, and this was a good lighthearted get away. Ashton Kutcher and Katherine Heigl star in a film that has been referred to a play on Mr. & Mrs. Smith.

Kutcher is a hitman who wants out of the business, Heigl is insecure after a recent breakup. They meet on vacation in Europe and start a normal life. When Kutcher's old boss tries to contact him everyone they know starts coming after trying to kill them.

A lot about this movie doesn't make any sense. Heigl isn't the best actress, yet Kutcher proves that even if he is a jackass in real life he can act. Catherine O'Hara has really let herself go and Tom Selleck is just average in a minor role.

Overall it is a typical romantic [dark] comedy. For this genre 6/10 really isn't that bad, and if you are in the movie for a movie you want to put little to no thought into this is a good choice.

Vote: 6/10

IMDB Link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1103153/

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